You Should Probably Ignore This

Let’s paint a picture, you and me. It starts with parotits. How does one paint parotits exactly? Picture mumps, only sexier. Now only put it on one side of the face, resulting in a nice derp-blowfish look. Now add a team of med students poking blue latex at this rare condition. Now add a cranky…

HELLO My Name Is…

I’ll go first. Guys, it’s been too long. I know. And it’s totally my fault. It’s already August. Office goodies are on sale again (met with much rejoicing). Pumpkin beer is in the grocery store (not Pumking though, they’re too classy). Days are getting shorter. I don’t know how this happened. I’m torn between singing “lalalala I can’t…

My Left Hand is a Ginger Step-Child

Summer is Million-Dollar Brynne Season. I think it’s because I’m cold-blooded and I need the sunshine to learn what it’s like to be a fully functioning human being after the pits of winter. I start lots of new things in the summer. It’s really my resolution season. I’m cutting caffeine (gulp), sugar, and alcohol out my…